Nov 30 2011

No one you can really talk to?

When it gets lonesome at the top… 

Are you talking 


to your SELF?



Those who talked to themselves were once considered out of step with reality, and those who out-loud answered their own questions were thought to be in urgent need of psychoanalysis… or a straitjacket.. perhaps even a lobotomy, like in the gruesome 1450s in England. But today? You’re in luck!

Judge-and-jury assessments like this obviously don’t include entrepreneurs. After all, you probably talk to yourself at least hourly, and carry a lifetime reputation for being crazy. I mean, how else could you still be good enough to be in business in this staggering leaderless economy?

When you decide to become an entrepreneur,

you necessarily choose to also become your

own (often lonesome) sounding board.  


You should know, by the way, I’m not trying to put a damper on your rants and raves and ongoing mutterings. Those activities, in fact, can be stress-reducing in and of themselves, and serve the purpose of clearing your head — something like a wet retriever shaking off water while standing on your foot! (Had that experience, eh?)

What I am suggesting is that you add to your self-talk repertoire, a bunch of other self-oriented and self-focused actions — like trusting your SELF and appreciating your SELF and recognizing your SELF-uniqueness.

Yeah, but that borders on being selfish, doesn’t it? And don’t we all know that selfish behavior is not a good thing for society, our planet, our personal long-term value? Absolutely. But I’m not speaking of self-aggrandizement. I am addressing the basic life and business success need — to be oriented toward one’s SELF.

Calling it selfish or not doesn’t matter. It’s what your purpose and intentions are all about that really count. When we can be oriented toward our selves in our thoughts and actions, we can be –among other things– more aware of the needs of others, and how we might best be able to help meet or fill those needs in addition to our own.

Selfishness in this respect also tips our internal scales in favor of a more improved, more productive and balanced state of mental and emotional health.

The more we appreciate and value our SELVES and our uniqueness’s, the more we tend to respect the uniqueness’s of others, and the more effective we can become at improving our pathways toward self-sufficiency, self-determination, and the all-important life quality that traditional schools fail to teach: self-esteem.

So the thin line to walk is being able to keep humility and let go of egotism while nurturing self-respect and fostering self-development through increased self-awareness. A high-wire act? If you choose to make it difficult on your self, it is… and it will be. But the choice is yours. And NOW is the time to act! Good luck!


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Hal@Businessworks.US   302.933.0116

Open  Minds  Open  Doors

Many thanks for your visit and God Bless You.

Make today a GREAT day for someone!

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Aug 10 2008






   . . . SO DON’T YOU





      As a youngster, I remember snickering at seeing one of these comedic placards that you always find in tourist trap souvenir stores (and the one next to my friend’s father’s fish tank!).

     Well, you know what?  That maybe-not-so-silly little pool rule seems to me to have some surprisingly important value when you apply the notion to working in someone else’s office, joining in someone else’s conversation, sitting in on someone else’s meeting, visiting in someone else’s home, entering someone else’s private space, and being entrusted to spend someone else’s money. 

     Break it down and it’s all about respect, which sometimes these days appears to be going the way of buggy whips, 8-track cassettes, and carbon paper.  The only trouble is that buggy whips, 8-track cassettes, and carbon paper are all things, and have all been replaced by newer better stuff.  Respect (aka R-E-S-P-E-C-T, as in the song!), though, is a value, not a thing.  And I’ve never heard of an adequate substitute. 

     We speak of having to earn respect.  We’re told as children to respect our elders . . . and keep a respectful distance from the neighborhood mongrel, and from strangers who offer candy.  Yet, something here is missing. 

How many friends, family members and work associates can you honestly say you respect? 

How many do you think respect you? 

(Have you earned it?) 

How important is respect to your life pursuits? 

Your career? 

Your love life? 

Your feelings about your SELF? 


     What can you do to make this better than it is, or turn it around if it’s headed in the wrong direction?  What specific steps can you take now that are genuine (vs. quick-fix), to help yourself gain greater respect from others?  How much of your answer to the last question relates to the amount of respect you put out to those around you?

     A good place to start may be to take inventory so that you have a clearer image of those who are “around you”!   Draw a target —three or four concentric circles— on paper and decide who is closest to you (put them or he or she in the middle circle), next closest person/people (next ring), and so forth.  Of course, include animals if you like. 

     A few rings worth will give you a more accurate and balanced and realistic idea than the image you may have of these relationships that you carry around in your head.  If you’re happy with your circles, congratulations!  If you think you can do better, the R-E-S-P-E-C-T song isn’t a bad place to begin!  (Oh, and by the way, there is no end to respecting others!) 



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                                        or 302.933.0116 or Hal@BusinessWorks.US

Thanks for visiting. Go for your goals! God Bless You.

“The price of freedom is eternal vigilance!” [Thomas Jefferson]

Make today a GREAT day for someone!

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