Feb 02 2009


“Let’s see, why don’t we sell


our cars by showing guys


crash their motorcycles?” 


Let’s show the guy that makes a wisecrack in a business meeting get thrown from the high rise office building meeting site.  Let’s show a man getting a bowling ball dropped on his head.  Let’s show people shooting at each other.  Let’s show blood spattering. 

Oh, and, by the way, let’s not worry about the whole violence deal; we’ll just smoke-and-mirrors it all so nobody cares, and it all serves to mask the negativity . . . like the guy who’s blasted through the conference room window out of the meeting will have his fall broken by landing in gently forgiving shrubs, and then he’ll get up a little stunned and tell the camera he was just kidding about his meeting comment.  No body will notice the violent edge because they’ll be so busy laughing. 




     I’m no peacenik or tree hugger or love-is-the-answer nutcase.  I’m even a “24” fan.  But I am a human being, like most human beings, who respects human life and doesn’t see anything funny or entertaining about violent representations used in TV commercials to sell products and services in primetime hours when children are watching!

     I find this particularly distressing and tasteless when program scheduling is aimed at a viewing audience that targets children . . . in the media and professional sports’ feeble attempts to build fan base, they have crossed the line. 

     This Superbowl run of commercials, with a very small handful of tasteful exceptions (and you know which companies these were) was hands down the absolute WORST collection of moronic TV advertising spots ever shown in sponsorship of one single event in the history of the world! 

     What on Earth makes the primadonna creative directors at America’s top advertising agencies think for ONE SECOND that the idiotic commercial storyline he or she was sold by some space cadet art director and dope-smoking writer could possibly be appropriate or salesworthy to push down the clients’ collective throats and written off as being in good judgement?

     [In case you’re wondering about the strength of my convictions, incidentally, I spent a dozen years working at three of the world’s most famous ad agencies, and won a national award at it.  I know whereof I speak!]

     How could ANY one think that the crap presented to Superbowl audiences (especially children) had the remotest chance of reflecting positively on the clients’ businesses?  Tell me.  I really want to hear this answer.  I want to know how dumb you can get?  It’s unbelieveable is what it is. 

     It is pitiful that any company in its right mind (whatever that might be) could even imagine that the impressions made on the viewing public would possibly translate to increased sustained sales.  Positively won’t happen.  But then hey, how hard do you sell your braindead ideas to clients when they’re putting up $3,000,000 for a 30-second commercial and your company is earning roughly half a million dollars for that one 30-second commercial?  Huh?

     Madison Avenue disgraced itself for stooping so low as to buy into the pretend violent mindset of low-life TV wrestling, and pawn it off as a client’s humorous attempt at reaching out to the tough-guy football fan crowd. 

     Got some news for you marketing research and focus group geeks: the football fan crowd you think you scored big with is not a collection of stereotype tough guys.  And I hope you sleazy characters who sold these commercials from the media to the agencies to the clients are all out of work soon! 

     That whole crowd of know-nothing advertising executives who haven’t a clue about what really sells, and don’t care anyway is almost as bad as those behind the warped decision to allow has-been Springsteen on the halftime stage.  They probably thought he was great while the rest of us all ran to throw up when he couldn’t sing on key or even hold his breath long enough to carry the notes he once made famous. 

     There was a reason of course that “The Boss” only performed old biggies that everybody knew . . . a great cover for fading skills!  He had no right to be there.  I feel sorry for his fans that he made such a fool of himself. 

     But I guess it’s all about money, right?  Right.  But that doesn’t mean it doesn’t suck!    halalpiar

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