If this kills you, call your doctor!

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pink elephant




causes excessive bleeding,


liver or kidney disease, cancer,


congestive heart failure, death or


suicide, be sure to tell your doctor.



Are you kidding? Does anyone out there in pharmaceutical fairyland realize how utterly ridiculous they sound trying to bury imbecilic disclaimer utterances like this in the middle of fantasy advertising film footage of joyful, beach-skipping, pool-jumping, exhilarated couples and families and pets?

Do you overpaid ad agency wackos think the whole world is stupid?

Surely you jest? I mean who in their right mind is going to run out and buy (or request an Rx for) your moronic brand name medication after one-tenth of a second of thought about the purposefully misleading messages you dare to flood the airwaves with? That’s like promising a pink elephant!

In case you haven’t noticed, this is 2016. We are far beyond such childish displays of intentionally deceptive, insulting, brain-wasting messages.

And your market research people are wrong. No one rushes to their pharmacy or doctor (or undertaker) requesting your stupid-named, stupidly-advertised, wildly over-priced brand because they identify with the actors and actresses and phony scripts in phony settings set to jubilant music with schmaltzy-voice over announcers rattling out disclaimer warnings like they were available ice cream toppings.

Let’s get rid of this nonsense in favor of reality and straightforward educational presentations. How about messages that reach out and grab?

Sorry, but I really don’t need to see animated intestines dancing on my TV screen accompanied by threats of death from constipation or diarrhea to appreciate the plights of those who suffer such inhumane ailments.

How refreshing would it be, instead, to see and hear advertising that teaches how to carefully question (and carefully listen to the answers provided by) my healthcare professionals?

scull and crossbones

It really IS time for pharma businesses to start acting and talking like responsible adults with more concern for the well-being of human beings than for lining their pockets with astronomically disproportionate salaries and for covering their butts with thinly disguised legal jargon . . . just in case their great products should fail. And don’t blame the government. We all know they are clueless. EXPLAIN government-mandated disclaimers. Don’t bury them.

Stop the foolishness. Speak the truth. Teach us. Show us. Educate us. Be specific, don’t gloss over. Use honest true facts, not make-believe charts and misleading visuals. Be the kinds of teachers you’d like to see your children have. INTEGRITY is the word! Now would you like to know how I REALLY feel? 😉

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