CRITICISM: Dishing Out and Taking It In

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First of all,




Public is the place


for praise only!


     There is no career more demanding of thick skin than that of a writer. Because everyone thinks they can write (which is of course a massive misconception), writers live in a breeding ground of rejection and criticism. They learn how to take it in. They learn to not take it personally, to process the thinking behind it, and to make it be constructive.

     But most people in other careers will cry, or bitch, or stomp their foot, or kick the dog, or return with a gun. Unfortunately, many of those who dish it out, rarely concern themselves with sensitivities on the receiving end.

     Business and professional practice owners and managers who believe they are the best at what they do (that’s like what?  99.7%?) tend to have massive egocentric personalities. Many think they know it all. They seldom concern themselves with the feelings of those they criticize. And some simply don’t care what others think or feel.

     The most successful bosses are neither tyrants nor mollycoddlers. They are the ones who save critical comments for behind closed doors, who start and end with sincere compliments, who explain themselves and their rationales, who ask questions about why something was said or done in a way they don’t like (just in case they might possibly be wrong in their assumptions), and then who make a major point of criticizing the behavior involved, not the person involved. 

     Remember that asking someone “Why” something happened is never ever as useful or important as asking “How” something happened — or better yet — “How can we prevent this type of thing from happening in the future?”

     Why not “Why?” Because asking someone “Why?” simply sets up getting an excuse for an answer. “Why were you late again today?” will get you “My car broke down, my dog ate my sock” kinds of replies.  

     Asking “How?” gets you real solutions because it forces an assessment of the process involved in the screw-up. Once we know HOW something went wrong, it’s easier to fix it. “How?” is even more productive when it’s followed by a pointed request such as: “Can you please give me a bullet list by noon (or the end of the day) with the three steps that need to be taken (or that you need to take) that will help us eliminate this problem altogether?”  

Comment below or Hal@BusinessWorks.US Thanks for visiting. Go for your goals! God Bless You! Make it a GREAT DayBlog emails free via RSS feed, $1/mo Amazon Kindle. GRANDPARENT Gift?

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