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Slithering Sales Saliva


DON’T TELL ME YOU DON’T KNOW THIS SALESPERSON who starts out smart and ends up sloppy enough to never get a repeat sale, maybe lose the company’s customer forever:

Here’s what’s in it for you, Mr. Bigbucks. . .”  “These are the benefits I heard you say you’ve been looking for, Mr. Bigbucks.”  “How would you like us to bill you for this Mr. Bigbucks?”  “Please say hello to your brother for me, Mr. Bigbucks.”  “Be sure to call me at this number anytime, Mr. Bigbucks.”  “Thanks for your business, Mr. Bigbucks.”  “And, hey, ha-ha, did you hear about the guy with the little head who goes into a bar and says . . . ?”


There are some savvy sales starter-uppers out there who turn instantly stupid the minute they make a close or get a commitment.  And some who wait for the customers next visit when they think things are now chummy enough to let down their hair.  

It is never in good taste to have bad taste! 


The truth is it is NEVER okay to tell ANY customer off-color stories.   If you’re serious about selling as a career (and you should be no matter what your career, because you’re selling all day, every day even if you’re a doctor or pastor or military leader), then you’ve got to know that you are on stage all day. 

Everything you say or do is noticed by someone.


I’m urging you to be on-guard and neurotic?  No.  I’m saying that a professional salesperson makes a conscious choice to act professionally ANYplace and in ANY circumstances where there is a potential (or even possible) customer present.  That’s hard!  Don’t choose for it to be hard.  Choose “easy!”   

Yes, Shakespeare.  Yes, “All the world’s a stage,

and all its men and women merely actors…” 


A basic tenet of all good sales, and customer service, and customer relationship training is that the customer is always right, the customer is always right, the customer is always right, the customer is always right . . . all of the time, in every instance and every situation short of physical contact or illegal behavior. 

If you listen to your prospect or customer carefully enough, and use eye contact enough to avoid distraction, and only talk 20% of the time, you will find plenty of humorous things to comment on that are pleasant.  Border-line comments and guffaw-type jokes simply don’t fit in any sales process outside the world of entertainment, and even then . . .

A customer may laugh with (at?) your “beer-drinking-style joke”, but think twice about you and your behavior once they’re headed off to another meeting or home.  It’s not worth it.  It’s not smart.  It’s sloppy.  It loses sales.  Clean up your act or risk the big hook coming out from behind the curtain to pull you off the stage.  Smile.  Be professional.  Sell.  Have a great rest of the week!  

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Thanks for visiting. Go for your goals. God Bless you.

Make today a GREAT day for someone!

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