Feb 06 2011

A Great Day For Football Haters!

Shop ‘n drive in peace ‘n quiet!


What a wonderful thing, the Superbowl,

for those who don’t care about it. 


You can commandeer the extra TV, take it to the attic or basement and watch anything your little heart desires without interruption.  It’s a great day to go shopping or take a drive because everyone else is not doing either.

You can go to the ocean and walk on the beach or boardwalk and know that every person you see there thinks the same way you do about this brainless, gorilla sport that attracts more heavy drinkers than athletes, and that can’t hold a candle to baseball or tennis or volleyball for genuine instinctive athleticism and mental challenge. 

No, I’m not calling all football players wimps, or all football fans drunkards. 


I’m just saying that football is not a sport that’s notorious for producing literary, scientific and artistic genius’s (geni?), and that —to me– it’s more amazing to watch what companies will spend more than T H R E E   M I L L I O N   D O L L A R S  on (for less than 60 seconds of sponsorship), than to see the event itself. 


The commercials are, admittedly, always super themselves. 


But that makes me think we should just have a “Super Commercial Bowl” and skip the football stuff all together. 

We could root for one beer or car company over the other, buy all their promotional gear, put giant promotional junk in our yards, hold tailgate picnics outside of neighborhood bars and car showrooms, make cute little cookies and cupcakes in the shape of the manufacturer we’re rooting for, and call central phone numbers at a $1.99 a pop to vote on our favorite commercial. 


The winning company would have TV crews in their locker room after the contest and spray champagne on each other.  Kids could go to school the next day and dis the losers. 

We could all txt msg our teenagers with something more substantial to discuss for a change (besides, “Hey, how’s it goin’?” and “Fine” or “Whadya do at school today?” and “Nuttin” or “Where are you going?” and “Out.”). 

Tomorrow, we could gather round America’s watercoolers and coffee shops and talk about which parts of which commercials we liked best and thought were stupidest . . . Whooooooh!  Wait just a cotton-pickin’ minute!  I forgot.  We already do most of that already anyway, right? 

So enlighten me:

We need football because?????? 


P.S. Just heard the news that the most “chicken wings” consumed in the history of the world are consumed on Superbowl Sunday!!! That makes for an awful lot of chickens out walking the streets . . . so be careful!


 I must be missing something.  [;<} But then, what do I know?

I’m just a baseball fan (as if you hadn’t guessed).




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www.TheWriterWorks.com or 302.933.0116 or Hal@BusinessWorks.US

“The price of freedom is eternal vigilance!”   [Thomas Jefferson]

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2 responses so far

Dec 31 2008


What are you


waiting for?


I know.  You’re waiting for a parade.  The doctor?  Next Christmas?  Someone else to go first?  Your parent’s approval?  Your boss’s approval?  A work order?  5PM?  Lunchtime?  Vacation?  Your birthday?  A full moon?  High tide?  Rock bottom?  Another way out?  The Mets to win the World Series?  The car in front of you to get out of the passing lane?  Your child to become President?  Your Father to strike oil?  A winning lottery ticket?   


If you answered “YES” to any of the above, or anything even remotely resembling any of the above, you are too filled with excuses to make a success of yourself.  I can’t help you.  You need a shrink.  Happy New Year and come again sometime.

Now.  Who’s left out there?  Anybody?  Good.  Well, then there’s still hope after all.  If you’re truly not waiting for some event or some person in order to move forward with your life –and especially your business pursuits– then odds are you’ve just been procrastinating. 

Putting stuff off is okay sometimes.  It happens to all of us.  But if you don’t want to end up like those I dismissed in the second paragraph, you might need to give yourself a smack alongside your head or (if you can figure out how to do it) kick yourself in the butt, and get yourself in gear!

How much more productive can you bewith your waiting time (you know. . . bank lines, traffic lights, bridges, RR crossings, commuter trains, subways, boats and buses, the dentist, MVB)? 

Next question: what’s in your pocket or briefcase or pocketbook right now? 


If your answerdoesn’t include a pen, paper, or laptop, or a cassette recorder (remember those?) or cellphone (no, not to call that hot date for after dinner suggestions, but perhaps handle a few business calls that don’t require extensive note taking) or blackberry (no, not to text message –er, sorry, txmsg– cousin Bertha to see what time she’s headed for the local gin mill, but perhaps to send yourself some notes of ideas you get so you needn’t carry them in your head?) or digital camera or pocket pad or sticky notes, or a book to read . . . the answer to the first question is that you can be a LOT more productive.  [Hint: These are all tools or avenues of productivity except as noted!]

I know peoplewho’ve put together complete photo essays standing in line at the post office.  I know highly acclaimed writers who write as many street and business names down as they can see while stopped at red lights (that they can cherry-pick from later when they’re seeking character and location names for their works of fiction).  I know an engineer who says he stimulates his brain by sketching vehicles and machinery while waiting for trains and bridges.

The point is, like the old Schlitz Beer commercials used to proclaim, “You only go round once in life!” (Well some maybe do a few trips, but most of us . . .) and we all only conveniently remember how short lifetimes can be when someone close to us passes away. 


SO . . .

  • Stop with the delays, excuses, nonproductive and unproductive waits. 

  • Stop staring into space wishing you were somewhere else. 

  • Stop bemoaning the lousy delay experiences and start DOING the stuff you’ve been saying, “Well, someday, I …” TODAY is “SOMEDAY”! 

Some action is always better than no action.


And, by the way, remember that it’s ALL YOUR CHOICE because all of behavior is a choice.  So choose to march shoulder-to-shoulder with time. 

Make the most of it. 

Make your mark. 

Make a difference.  

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