Apr 05 2011

Dealing With Psychos

Mixed in with your Employees,


Customers, Vend0rs, SalesReps,


Investors: is a “Psycho” or two!



Channel-surfing the other night, a woman addicted for over twenty years to daily feasting on toilet paper! I was promptly reminded that there are weirdos everywhere, and the business world is no exception. Thankfully, I never had to work with the likes of a TP-eating sicko, but I have had to deal with some genuine head cases, and guess what?

The task is not as impossible as it may seem at first. The key is to separate yourself emotionally from the smoking volcano. Rise above it and give it as much space and patience as possible.

You don’t want to be a shrink?

Sometimes in life, when you’ve directly or indirectly chosen to box yourself into an undesirable situation, there’s no choice.


On those occasions (which hopefully are rare), turn on your alert system without setting off any alarms. Tune in to what’s in front of you. Take some deep breaths to help yourself get focused. Contact your inner “adult” — the part of you that’s calm and caring and empathetic but that’s –as Thoreau once urged us to be– forever on the alert.

Recognize that your self-identity (how you see yourself) needs to step back and your personality (how others see you) needs to step up. People who are in difficult emotional or mental states (or physically ill or injured) will rarely have any interest in what you think of yourself. It’s difficult for them to think much beyond their own skin.

If you’ve ever had any practice with a cranky baby or temper tantrum toddler, you’re way ahead of the game.


Instead of trying to override or overpower a troubled individual, try to “buy into” a compatible level of relating and then exercise a gently persistent adult-like tone. Without being bossy or pushy or demanding, simply be rational and understanding. Be persuasive by not allowing yourself to get drawn into the other person’s dilemma or issues.

Does all this take time and effort? Is it hard work?

Hey, do shrinks get burned out?


It’s definitely not a frame of mind you want to be in for any lengthy period of time, but it’s also one that –if you make up your mind to commit your energy to assisting someone else instead of thinking about yourself– gives you an opportunity to help an unbalanced someone to gain enough stability to function without the presence of threat.

If your own personality tends to be explosive, you may want to stay in your rubber room and not deal with others at all, but then, you wouldn’t be much of a leader, would you? Business success requires leadership at every level, not just sales or just innovative thinking or just financial management. People are your most important asset!



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www.TheWriterWorks.com or 302.933.0116 or Hal@BusinessWorks.US

Thanks for visiting. Go for your goals! God Bless You.

“The price of freedom is eternal vigilance!” [Thomas Jefferson]

Make today a GREAT day for someone!

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Mar 25 2010

Seeking Success? BE SELFISH!

When it all looks like


it’s crumbling down


 around you–get selfish!


     Selfish . . . as in Piggy? No . . . as in oriented toward your SELF!

     You can’t control government except at election time. You can’t control irate customers who give you fits trying to nickle and dime you at every turn. You can’t control what goes on behind your back unless you never turn your back. You can’t control a lot of people and situations in your business and personal life. But you CAN control YOU! 

     What you say and think and do is entirely your choice, and entirely under your control. (If you doubt this and are ready to shoot back examples to the contrary, examine your examples. Odds are 100 out of 100 that you made a conscious or unconscious choice to set yourself up to not have a choice, but -ALWAYS – there is or was a choice. Take advantage of how you can use that information now, today!) 


HOW you respond to someone or something that’s out of your control is within your control.


     So stop choosing to think that everyone else is pushing your button. No one can reach inside your brain and control how you think.

     The great motivational theory and studies psychologist Abraham Maslow focused his attention on the path and process of self-actualization. In addition to using their own intellects and talents, Maslow said that self-actualizing people take responsibility for others as well as themselves and (according to James and Jongeward in their classic book, Born To Win), “have a childlike capacity for awareness and pleasure.”

     The authors proceed to note that “these individuals customarily have some mission in life, some task to fulfill, some problem outside themselves which enlists much of their energies … they work within a framework of values that are broad and not petty, universal and not local, and in terms of a century rather than a moment … have a wonderful capacity to appreciate again and again, freshly and naively, the basic goods of life with awe, pleasure, wonder, and even ecstasy, however stale these experiences may have become to others.”

     If you’ve let outside influences under your skin, it may be time to appreciate more what you already have in life and to take stock in whether those around you are contributing to your growth and happiness, and to the growth and success of your business — or are they detracting from it?

     Exerting your own sense of self-actualization can influence others to change negative thoughts and behaviors and directions, but — more importantly — it will serve to boost your own rockets and reinforce that you’re not such a bad “gal” or “guy” after all.

     You have enormous powers to turn things around when you decide to consistently apply your strengths to what’s in your face or on your plate. Keep outside influences outside.

     Draw instead from your own inner strength and the inner strength of your business, and from those who live inside your inner circle. Making decisions and conducting yourself from inside yourself is a better, happier, healthier choice every time.  

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Hal@Businessworks.US or 302.933.0116

“The price of freedom is eternal vigilance!” [Thomas Jefferson] 

Thanks for visiting. Go for your goals. God Bless You.

Make today a GREAT day for someone!

No responses yet


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