Jul 26 2010

EXCUSES: DISHONORABLE INTENTIONS?

The check’s in the

                         

mail. I’ll get back   

                              

to you Friday. 

                                                         

I’ll send you that

                                

update the minute

                           

it comes in. As soon

                                       

as we get an invoice.

                                                                  

When shipment

                                       

arrives. But I never  

                                                                        

got your note. Your

                               

email must have

                         

gotten lost in  

                            

Cyberspace. Oh,

                          

that?That was a

                     

“warning”?

                                                                                                                             

     You’ve heard it all, right? Maybe you’ve even said some of it yourself. But when your intentions are genuine and sincere, nothing can be more frustrating than hearing a pile of excuses . . . from a customer, a prospect, a supplier, an investor, an employee, a boss.

     So, what’s the magic answer? It’s somewhere within yourself. You may not be able to control the attitudes that give birth to replies like these, but you can control your own attitude. You, in fact, are the only one who can.

     And by controlling your own response to the excuses you hear, you are cultivating an opportunity for yourself to set a true leadership example. By setting an example, you:  

A) Keep your emotions out of the fray and

B) May actually influence the offender to re-visit her or his initial behavior or verbal representation of it, and reconsider a better, more productive, higher integrity avenue.

     Perhaps you’re not Henry Ford or Bill Gates or Mary Kay, and the idea of changing the world is not on your breakfast plate, but — as a small business owner or manager or entrepreneur — you are in an extraordinarily unique position to make a difference for yourself, for your family, and for those you work with, simply by choosing to respond instead of react.

Besides, if you never react,

you can never over-react!

                                           

     People offer excuses to cover their own feelings of inadequacy. Most of the time, you can probably count on excuses being not so much intentionally dishonorable as a shortcoming of the person who’s offering them up in the self-esteem category. Some people who feel they can’t get positive recognition will opt instead for negative recognition because it’s at least some recognition.

     Humans crave recognition. And some recognition always beats indifference.

The opposite of love is not hate.

It’s indifference!

                                                                                

     When you hear excuses, appreciate the insecurities behind them. When it’s possible to overlook them, do it and then make a point of offering (genuine) appreciation for instances of getting a job done without a presentation of reasons why it didn’t get done.

     Offer more encouragement than you might usually provide. Be kinder than you might usually be (because everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle). Appreciate differences in perso0nalities and behaviors and help others to grasp the choosing behavior idea through your examples.

     Excuses are a way of life, but they are not always intentional or dishonorable. When you give the benefit of doubt to others, you may get bit in the butt a few times, but you’ll be serving the important purpose of minimizing anxieties and demonstrating productive leadership traits most of the time.

     The captain who keeps an even keel and balanced ship through stormy seas marks every journey with success.

    

 302.933.0116    Hal@BusinessWorks.US  

Thanks for visiting. Go for your goals! God Bless You.

God Bless America and America’s Troops.

“The price of freedom is eternal vigilance!” [Thomas Jefferson] 

Make today a GREAT day for someone!

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Dec 16 2008

IT TAKES ALL KINDS, my Mother used to say.

Hey, ja’hear the one about . . .? 

                                                                                

     You know how you get all kinds of email junk FWD’d to you every day from well-intentioned friends?  It’s like spam that’s endorsed (vs. unsolicited, which is much easier to delete). 

     There are the emails and attachments from “the guys” who have somehow convinced themselves that you are the perfect compatriot to share piles of what they think are yuck-it-up jokes (that come out of the same distasteful sexist denial closets as Elliot Spitzer and Bill Clinton).

     Then there are the “other guys” (sometimes the same ones) who love to bombard you with x-rated porn talk and photos and videos because they get off on it and can’t imagine anyone not being pleased for the viewings.

     Oh, yeah, and less offensive but equally weird, there are the schmaltzes who send every dripping piece of Hallmark-style drivel that give you the creepy-crawlys just to scroll through them. 

     Oh well, it takes all kinds, my Mother used to say (an Irish philosopher, of course!)

     Now I’m hardly a prude, and I enjoy a good email joke as much as anybody.  I especially love getting emails filled with spectacular photos of spectacular places I know I’ll probably never see otherwise … kind of a National Geographic fetish.

     But, you know what, the FWD’d emails I like best are those that make me think.

     The best of these that I’ve seen recently (anonymous of course) has provoked me to wrap tonight’s post around it because I think it’s something worth sharing, especially on the advent of our joyous and peace-filled holiday season.

     Personally, I try to never use the word “can’t” or “cannot” because I believe everything and anything CAN be done, but this list of 4 stopped me in my tracks.  It made me think.

     Tell me what YOU think (Click on “No responses yet” or “Comments” below then type in the window, or email with “4 Things” in the subject line to Hal@TheWriterWorks.com . . .

FOUR THINGS

YOU CANNOT RECOVER . . .     

1.  The stone, after it’s thrown.

2.  The word, after it’s said.

3.  The occasion, after the loss.

4.  The time, after it’s gone. 

 

Put your own spin on this, think about what it means to YOU.  Make the conclusion you come to about it work FOR you, not by regretting, but by being kinder than necessary, kinder than you usually are, kinder perhaps than you want to be.  Go ahead, try it for the holidays! What have you got to lose?  A little kindness?  Hmmmmm.          halalpiar

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